My daughter messaged me today saying she was at a theme park - she's not a roller coaster kinda gal...but was forced into it and had quite a good day - felt yuck on some rides, but good on others.
It's a bit like life really - that's such a cheesy line to lead into my post! Ha! But it is.
I'm very glad she is stepping out of her comfort zone and trying new things in a new country with new people. It's her living life and I'm so happy for her and also for me watching her life unfold.
I'm trying to write a children's picture book at the moment. I'm loving it - and it's so different to writing a song. I think I want to put too much in it. Too much information. Simple is good. Less is more.
But back on track a bit..... life IS a roller coaster - sometimes you're out of control and it's just carrying on regardless. It's up and down. It's round and round. It's even upside down!
I find, when things aren't quite going to plan or I'm not feeling 100% in whatever respect, it's good to put myself in someone else's shoes. Then I realise wouldn't want to be anyone else. No one should want to be someone else.
When I was a teenager, I often wanted to be someone else - well, there were a couple of girls I really wanted to be. One had really funky hair and wore really cool funky clothes (like fingerless gloves and layers....lots of layers)
OH, wait a minute - I have always wanted to be my lawyer!! She's so on to it and clever and sensible. She wears her clothes just right and always looks great. I think what I really wish is that I was a bit more LIKE her....you know, sensible and on to it and a bit more stylish...and richer...hahaha!
Funny post, but there you have it. It's tea time.
Sunday, August 3, 2014
Monday, July 28, 2014
One of those days
Today was one of those days. And by 'one of those days' I mean, one of those days where I knew what I should be doing, but I just couldn't bring myself to do it!
A week ago I sent emails out to around 170 Kindys and preschools in Auckland. It's always a toss up whether to ring first, or email first....so this time I tried the email approach on advice from a friend. A week later and half of them haven't been opened, 3 have responded and I have booked one gig.
So, after winning the video award, I thought it might be easier to get gigs...I was wrong. It's never easy...well, not for most of us I don't think.
Anyway, today was the day I was going to start ringing all those 170, let them know about me and what I do, ask them if they've seen the email, then if they'd like to book me. I just couldn't do it.
I did a lot of other things...like tidy my office up a bit....then luckily my stepson missed the school bus, so I drove him to school....then I went to The Warehouse and spent an hour wandering around in a daze, picking things up and putting them back...leaving with a couple of storage containers (which are sitting empty on my desk), a pair of red shoes to perform in and other sundry items which I can't even remember at the moment.
Then I rang a friend and asked if I could call in for a cuppa on the way home because I was feeling 'weird'. She said, 'great, come to our place and feel weird here, you'll fit right in'!
I left her place feeling much better, after two cups of Earl Grey tea, some cheese and pear on crackers and with an arm-full of her daughter's picture books to read. When I got home, I jumped on the exercycle for an hour and read them all.
Some days it is so hard to tell people how amazing you are...in fact it's hard to do that any day....and some days you just can't take being turned down time and time again....and on those days, it's best NOT to put yourself through it, because those are the days when people WILL turn you down and you WILL lose confidence in your ability.
Tomorrow though, is a new day I will ring those 170 potential gigs, or at least make a start of it. Let's hope tomorrow is NOT another one of those days.....
A week ago I sent emails out to around 170 Kindys and preschools in Auckland. It's always a toss up whether to ring first, or email first....so this time I tried the email approach on advice from a friend. A week later and half of them haven't been opened, 3 have responded and I have booked one gig.
So, after winning the video award, I thought it might be easier to get gigs...I was wrong. It's never easy...well, not for most of us I don't think.
Anyway, today was the day I was going to start ringing all those 170, let them know about me and what I do, ask them if they've seen the email, then if they'd like to book me. I just couldn't do it.
I did a lot of other things...like tidy my office up a bit....then luckily my stepson missed the school bus, so I drove him to school....then I went to The Warehouse and spent an hour wandering around in a daze, picking things up and putting them back...leaving with a couple of storage containers (which are sitting empty on my desk), a pair of red shoes to perform in and other sundry items which I can't even remember at the moment.
Then I rang a friend and asked if I could call in for a cuppa on the way home because I was feeling 'weird'. She said, 'great, come to our place and feel weird here, you'll fit right in'!
I left her place feeling much better, after two cups of Earl Grey tea, some cheese and pear on crackers and with an arm-full of her daughter's picture books to read. When I got home, I jumped on the exercycle for an hour and read them all.
Some days it is so hard to tell people how amazing you are...in fact it's hard to do that any day....and some days you just can't take being turned down time and time again....and on those days, it's best NOT to put yourself through it, because those are the days when people WILL turn you down and you WILL lose confidence in your ability.
Tomorrow though, is a new day I will ring those 170 potential gigs, or at least make a start of it. Let's hope tomorrow is NOT another one of those days.....
Tuesday, July 1, 2014
I'M IN THE FINALS!
Just over a week ago I found out that our video was in the APRA/What Now children's video of the year finals. What happened after I found out, was unusual....instead of being happy and excited, I felt on edge and a bit stressed about it.
Competitions are strange. They really are. We enter ...sometimes paying to enter, sometimes not....and then wait....
If you do make it into the 'finals', it's then onto the publicity. (Especially in the case of this particular competition where the winner is decided by public vote.) In this business, you have to be in the public's face as often as you can - so you try to seize every opportunity and see it as another step towards a sale. It often isn't! Turning votes, watches, people who love your songs, 'likes' on Facebook, happy dancing children at your concert...etc...into buyers, is the step in the game that's the most difficult. And for people like me, who aren't sales minded, nor egotistical (well, except when it comes to thinking my songs are awesome! ;)), nor pushy.....it's almost impossible.
When you don't get into a final, get a place or win a competition, it's always a funny feeling. It's always upsetting. You listen/watch/compare your stuff to the people who got in and sometimes you can understand the judges choices and sometimes you just can't. I find it hard to be unbiased. Very hard. And I suppose, if we as artists, didn't think we deserved to be in the top three, then we wouldn't be doing it! I can appreciate a good kids' song, but I'm very very picky.
There is definitely a sense that being beaten by someone else means you're obviously not as good as them at your 'craft'. Self-esteem often takes a bit of a beating.
I once declared I wouldn't enter any more contests!! And here I am giving myself a real battering!! This year I entered song, album AND video of the year. I didn't make the song or album final....but was lucky enough to make it into the video finals. Thanks to a lot of hard work and dedication by Aimee, her kids and Karl. And a good song.
I'm not really sure where I'm going with this....there are a lot of us hard-working NZ children's entertainers/song writers...making a lot of kids happy....some of us travel a lot, visit a lot of kids, do a lot of different and sometimes ODD (and difficult) gigs. Most of us are not even close to rich - we are lucky to be making a living. We all have some die-hard fans and we are all grateful for those people who come to our concerts, buy our music and let us know how much they love us! We all write very different songs, for different age groups.
I'm not sure a competition is the way to 'measure' our success...perhaps the kids' faces/smiles/laughter/dancing/happiness/singing and sometimes hugs is??
What do you think?
Competitions are strange. They really are. We enter ...sometimes paying to enter, sometimes not....and then wait....
If you do make it into the 'finals', it's then onto the publicity. (Especially in the case of this particular competition where the winner is decided by public vote.) In this business, you have to be in the public's face as often as you can - so you try to seize every opportunity and see it as another step towards a sale. It often isn't! Turning votes, watches, people who love your songs, 'likes' on Facebook, happy dancing children at your concert...etc...into buyers, is the step in the game that's the most difficult. And for people like me, who aren't sales minded, nor egotistical (well, except when it comes to thinking my songs are awesome! ;)), nor pushy.....it's almost impossible.
When you don't get into a final, get a place or win a competition, it's always a funny feeling. It's always upsetting. You listen/watch/compare your stuff to the people who got in and sometimes you can understand the judges choices and sometimes you just can't. I find it hard to be unbiased. Very hard. And I suppose, if we as artists, didn't think we deserved to be in the top three, then we wouldn't be doing it! I can appreciate a good kids' song, but I'm very very picky.
There is definitely a sense that being beaten by someone else means you're obviously not as good as them at your 'craft'. Self-esteem often takes a bit of a beating.
I once declared I wouldn't enter any more contests!! And here I am giving myself a real battering!! This year I entered song, album AND video of the year. I didn't make the song or album final....but was lucky enough to make it into the video finals. Thanks to a lot of hard work and dedication by Aimee, her kids and Karl. And a good song.
I'm not really sure where I'm going with this....there are a lot of us hard-working NZ children's entertainers/song writers...making a lot of kids happy....some of us travel a lot, visit a lot of kids, do a lot of different and sometimes ODD (and difficult) gigs. Most of us are not even close to rich - we are lucky to be making a living. We all have some die-hard fans and we are all grateful for those people who come to our concerts, buy our music and let us know how much they love us! We all write very different songs, for different age groups.
I'm not sure a competition is the way to 'measure' our success...perhaps the kids' faces/smiles/laughter/dancing/happiness/singing and sometimes hugs is??
What do you think?
Saturday, June 21, 2014
Life
It's been a few days!! The thing is....I only need to write when things aren't going well or I'm not feeling great. I guess that's true with a lot of song writers, and poets. (That's not true when it comes to writing children's songs of course. Imagine if I only wrote them when I was feeling down! There'd be depressed kids all over the place!)
I started this blog when I was a bit low. Deciding to have '100 Happy Days' has really helped me to focus on the good things each day.
Also, things in general have picked up - as they tend to do.
A good friend said to me, after listening to a woman talk about a near death experience that 'Death' was soothing, calm and peaceful...where as 'Life' was screaming at her, right in her face, yelling at her to get up, get going, get moving......
Life IS full on, it's not an easy road, it's hard work, it sometimes does scream at us (and we want to scream back!) It sometimes slaps us in the face. It bemuses and confuses us. It requires effort.
It's full of ups and downs, ebbs and flows, highs and lows, good times and bad...it's a matter of managing the rough patches and making the most of the good times. No one can possibly be happy all the time - can they?
Here are some pics of what I think are some of the joys of life....
I started this blog when I was a bit low. Deciding to have '100 Happy Days' has really helped me to focus on the good things each day.
Also, things in general have picked up - as they tend to do.
A good friend said to me, after listening to a woman talk about a near death experience that 'Death' was soothing, calm and peaceful...where as 'Life' was screaming at her, right in her face, yelling at her to get up, get going, get moving......
Life IS full on, it's not an easy road, it's hard work, it sometimes does scream at us (and we want to scream back!) It sometimes slaps us in the face. It bemuses and confuses us. It requires effort.
It's full of ups and downs, ebbs and flows, highs and lows, good times and bad...it's a matter of managing the rough patches and making the most of the good times. No one can possibly be happy all the time - can they?
Here are some pics of what I think are some of the joys of life....
Thursday, June 12, 2014
Days 3 & 4
A duck waddling as fast as it's legs would carry it up the driveway in front of my car, a caravan made out of a Barbie tissue box, being in the recording studio and eating a yummy custard square.
Happy days 3 & 4.
After reading my last two posts I decided that no one really wants to know all the ins and outs, all the details of my musical career - unless, perhaps, if they are a musician, as they'll be having the same struggles no doubt. So, not so many details from now on.
I had a sudden revelation this morning and nutting it out in my head (well, ok, out loud!) (I'm sure the driver in front of me must have thought I was MAD!) on my drive into Nelson helped put things into perspective. Sometimes I need to 'get stuff out' - even if no one is listening - and once it's out, it's not quite so all-consuming any more. Suffice it to say, I feel a lot better today.
I also came up with a new riff last night. First time I've sat down with my guitar to think about writing some 'adult' tunes. It felt satisfying! I really think I need to be in a band again - an 'adult' band. So I shall pursue this idea. I do recall pursuing it a while back by putting it out there on Facebook, only to freak out as soon as people wanted to join my band. Don't ask me why. That's just me.
Music is good for the soul - we all know that - and I guess doing it for a living is all well and good - and I DO enjoy the musical side of my 'job' - but I need to do something for myself as well. Timing is everything and now is the time for me do do some adult band stuff, again.
And one more thought for today while you pursue your own happiness - if someone close to you isn't pulling their weight, let them know!
Happy days 3 & 4.
After reading my last two posts I decided that no one really wants to know all the ins and outs, all the details of my musical career - unless, perhaps, if they are a musician, as they'll be having the same struggles no doubt. So, not so many details from now on.
I had a sudden revelation this morning and nutting it out in my head (well, ok, out loud!) (I'm sure the driver in front of me must have thought I was MAD!) on my drive into Nelson helped put things into perspective. Sometimes I need to 'get stuff out' - even if no one is listening - and once it's out, it's not quite so all-consuming any more. Suffice it to say, I feel a lot better today.
I also came up with a new riff last night. First time I've sat down with my guitar to think about writing some 'adult' tunes. It felt satisfying! I really think I need to be in a band again - an 'adult' band. So I shall pursue this idea. I do recall pursuing it a while back by putting it out there on Facebook, only to freak out as soon as people wanted to join my band. Don't ask me why. That's just me.
Music is good for the soul - we all know that - and I guess doing it for a living is all well and good - and I DO enjoy the musical side of my 'job' - but I need to do something for myself as well. Timing is everything and now is the time for me do do some adult band stuff, again.
And one more thought for today while you pursue your own happiness - if someone close to you isn't pulling their weight, let them know!
Monday, June 9, 2014
Day #2
Day two and my happiness came from a walk in the rain, followed by a hot shower and poached eggs on toast. Now I am supposed to be settling down to writing a couple of new songs for my 'Winter Warm-Up' concert in July. Which I will do and love, shortly.
I have been a yoyo lately. It's not unusual - I'm often a yoyo. But, I've been a lot more down than up in the past couple of months. It could be menopause (hooray)! It could be that I'm lacking in iron (which I'm yet to be tested for, but usually am). It could be constant confusion about my career. It could be the fact that it's been really hard to drum up work this year. It could be that I have more time on my hands (which is what I wanted, but have never been good at), OR it could simply be me.
I said I would be straight up..ish..so, here's the truth. Starting last term, I have rung, emailed, rung, emailed and emailed again many Kindys and ECCs in Christchurch - around 75 - to try to get a two week tour together. I've sent some of them "Dragons Under My Bed", free, to entice them. Yesterday morning I only had 3 gigs booked - THREE! But very happily a preschool with 2 centres booked a gig for each, so YAY, it's worth going for an overnight-er.
Sometimes it's hard to stay positive - I even had a friend do some ringing for me because she offered and I jumped at the chance! It's hard trying to sell yourself - much easier for someone else to do it! She found it difficult. That was, in some way, comforting.
I have been a yoyo lately. It's not unusual - I'm often a yoyo. But, I've been a lot more down than up in the past couple of months. It could be menopause (hooray)! It could be that I'm lacking in iron (which I'm yet to be tested for, but usually am). It could be constant confusion about my career. It could be the fact that it's been really hard to drum up work this year. It could be that I have more time on my hands (which is what I wanted, but have never been good at), OR it could simply be me.
I said I would be straight up..ish..so, here's the truth. Starting last term, I have rung, emailed, rung, emailed and emailed again many Kindys and ECCs in Christchurch - around 75 - to try to get a two week tour together. I've sent some of them "Dragons Under My Bed", free, to entice them. Yesterday morning I only had 3 gigs booked - THREE! But very happily a preschool with 2 centres booked a gig for each, so YAY, it's worth going for an overnight-er.
Sometimes it's hard to stay positive - I even had a friend do some ringing for me because she offered and I jumped at the chance! It's hard trying to sell yourself - much easier for someone else to do it! She found it difficult. That was, in some way, comforting.
Days 1 & 2
I saw this '100 Happy Days' thing on Facebook and thought, given my state of mind lately, it would be a good exercise to write posts and/or take photos for the next hundred days about what makes me happy or what I appreciate about each day.
Then, I thought, perhaps it's about time I let people know a bit more about Kath Bee - the person/children's songwriter/entertainer. Facebook is great - it gives people a wee insight into one's life - for me it's a great place for promotion and telling people what 'Kath Bee' the artist, is up to. And occasionally what I, Kath, am up to too. But it's not exactly real. I mean, all I say and put up there IS real....but it's only the good stuff. You know? IF I was posting as me...Kath...I would probably be putting up how I'm really feeling every day - the ups and downs of my life, my career etc. But as an artist, you don't want to tell people what ISN'T going well or how you're REALLY feeling, or what you REALLY feel like doing with your computer......
So, here's my blog, which will be including my 100 happy days, but also some other, more personal stuff. I'm not going to go all out - I don't want everyone to know EVERYTHING!! But a more real version of how everything is.
I started blogging YEARS ago and loved it. It's like a diary, that people read. It's a place where someone can get stuff out. Write down their thoughts. I made a couple of blog friends who I still communicate with today. Two older men in the USA (one whose dog is on my new Just Chillin' album!).
Now, the question is - why would someone WANT to know the real me? Why would a fan of Kath Bee want to know that she's not constantly happy, loving every minute of her concerts, travelling, writing (well, I do love that actually!) etc etc? Well, that remains to be seen - I guess if people read it, then they want to know. If you DON'T want to know what I'm really thinking or feeling, please don't read on!!!
What made me happy yesterday - my first day of my 100 - was this unbelievably gorgeous picture of this wee girl - and I'll leave it there for now.
Then, I thought, perhaps it's about time I let people know a bit more about Kath Bee - the person/children's songwriter/entertainer. Facebook is great - it gives people a wee insight into one's life - for me it's a great place for promotion and telling people what 'Kath Bee' the artist, is up to. And occasionally what I, Kath, am up to too. But it's not exactly real. I mean, all I say and put up there IS real....but it's only the good stuff. You know? IF I was posting as me...Kath...I would probably be putting up how I'm really feeling every day - the ups and downs of my life, my career etc. But as an artist, you don't want to tell people what ISN'T going well or how you're REALLY feeling, or what you REALLY feel like doing with your computer......
So, here's my blog, which will be including my 100 happy days, but also some other, more personal stuff. I'm not going to go all out - I don't want everyone to know EVERYTHING!! But a more real version of how everything is.
I started blogging YEARS ago and loved it. It's like a diary, that people read. It's a place where someone can get stuff out. Write down their thoughts. I made a couple of blog friends who I still communicate with today. Two older men in the USA (one whose dog is on my new Just Chillin' album!).
Now, the question is - why would someone WANT to know the real me? Why would a fan of Kath Bee want to know that she's not constantly happy, loving every minute of her concerts, travelling, writing (well, I do love that actually!) etc etc? Well, that remains to be seen - I guess if people read it, then they want to know. If you DON'T want to know what I'm really thinking or feeling, please don't read on!!!
What made me happy yesterday - my first day of my 100 - was this unbelievably gorgeous picture of this wee girl - and I'll leave it there for now.
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